I finished my trip across Kyrgyzstan and China, made home safe and sound and staying here already a few weeks.
Numbers are not exact as sometimes in a rain my computer didn’t work, so you have to add another 300-500 km.
Last day to Beijing I cycled for 15 hours and made a distance up to 200km.
At the beginning my friends kept saying to me that this trip will change me. Touring cyclists’ blogs said it will change my life. Nobody, including myself, was sure if I can make it. Apparently, I can.
Do you remember your biggest achievement? Do you know this feeling of a true success? Have you ever woke up several mornings in your best mood and your first thoughts were “I did it! Damn, what an ass-kicker I am!”? I didn’t have it. My friends now keep saying what I did is impressive – I keep staring at maps, measuring the distances and feel nothing.
Is my life changed and I found the meaning of my life and do I have now understanding of global existence’s inner processes and see harmony in everything? No. I’m running exactly the same life as I had before and it feels I was absent just 3 days.
Not that cycling was too easy for me, or distances were too small, or I’ve done something bigger in sports, but the truth is I don’t feel proud of myself.
I’m not depressed, neither I don’t have a sense of deprivation. I’m enjoying my life, eating well and having fun with friends. I don’t have a bad impression of the trip. My impression is indifferent. It’s been more than 2 weeks since I finished cycling and I still have no answer to the question “Why it is like that?”.
Hugs. My last ones here.